No longer there's facebook
No longer this blog will be publish.
I will keep it in my heart.
Dont need to find about my news.
I will disappear from this minutes onward
Seen you like it, i will.
You want me gone.

Passerby:

Another thanks for you CJT.
You've super pull me down okay.
Move on? Sorry and thanks
Bu i'm telling you i not going to move on anyfurther
Not anymore now.
I now only can say i lost it all.
Even you ! And i actually telling myself i've not.
Thanks. Afterall this while.

Only you will cone this blog.
Nobody know abt this blog existence.
Thanks

Thanks ah.

Now then i realised,
I actually lose your moral support toward me.
Thanks and i lose it all.
Even your support, i lose myself.
Real hard really real hard. I cant find anything to comfort me
Not even a single soul.
I hate chan jia en this fuckin person.
Not even a person trust me, not even you.
CJT.

Do take care when you're out sailing.
Do be careful.
I lost it all, even my only pillar in my mind
I thought you understand, i thought
But you dont believe it.

Can you just tell me.

Am i a nothing to you now?

You no longer care, we no longer text, no longer smile

我知道是我的错。
我真的很想发给你可是我害怕了

Just leave me to die better.

I can't define who is true and who is fake.
I can't believe whether to trust or not trust.
I began to doubt my ability to do thing or say.
Maybe i shouldn't have be out here ,
Maybe i shouldn't have appear.
Maybe i should say a bye.
I've lost all the battle.

Take care.
This is me, my life, my chaotic life i causes

I wonder how are you.
I wonder what are you doing.
I wonder where are you.
I wonder who are you with.
I dont have the courage to text you.
I think i lose it all after hearing and seeing you like this.
I lost it all at that night.
I wonder do you hate me
I wonder have you give me up. Siigh
Evrything now i'm wondering.
I'm scare but i miss you.
Where are you?
Our promises is it still there?
Just a text from you make me feel safe.
But i think it didnt even have.
I am worried you dont care anymore.
Day4

I wonder how are you.
I wonder what are you doing.
I wonder where are you.
I wonder who are you with.
I dont have the courage to trxt you.
I think i lose it all after hearing and seeing you like this.

I pray hard for your verdict.
Pray hard that nothing happen.

When you say dont need to text me when reach home
My heart hurt.

I saw you.
Wanted to talk to you more.
Wanted to run to hug you.
Wanted to just see you is enough.

I miss you day 2.

Wow . Is year 2010 back to update.

I dont know whether it's a good thing or bad.

Finally, i decided to give up everything .
Too much thing happening around me.
I lose alot of things in between al this matter
My best good sister , cynthia tan & tham yi tian
Do you all know how much i miss you both.
Everytime i miss, everytime i sad
I tend to look at the photo that we've taken.
It's like a never ending hurricane.
The will to survive in it , i have officially lose it all.
Do take care all of you. Really must.

Anyway, a sidenote
I bought a havanians slipper cos it broke.
I finally choose a colour out of all .

I chooses red
Reason is it had a significant meaning to me.
It's his favorite.

I just realise that you want me to move on forward
But sad to say,
I am not moving forward nor move on
But retreating backward to hide in a place or find a suitable place.

If i ever have a chance next life,
I would choose not to know you or you are my enemy
Because i have hurt you so much all this year.
It hurt me to see you suffer. It hurt me to know you're suffering alone.
If you're my enemy, at least i still can know how ur life is going
At least i still can yearn to see the smile on your face.
The smile that i first met in the first place which brought me to you.
I miss that. Please take care my dear.
You will never know what is going to happe next.
Jiayou in everyyhing you do.